Tuesday, January 12, 2010

My last day at work


dawned as any other normal day. (It was the Friday of the previous week) -Only the climate seemed to be on the downside - the Sun god having decided not to show up at all.

Proceedings went on as usual and it was time for me to leave for work. I had not explained to Jillu about me not going to work any more as I thought that she was too young to understand. However, that morning I tried explaining to Jillu that Amma will not be going to office any more and will be with her totally from Monday. As expected, she did not respond much and did not understand (I think). Anyways, I bid her good bye and left from home. 

On the way to office, my very dear friend (right from childhood ) who has tread the same path as me and along with me all these years, called up and asked "how do you feel? Do you recollect the first day at work? Flashback odudhaa?". Surprisingly, I was being very normal and it was like any other day for me and I conveyed the same to her as well. 

I think I spoke too soon :). The moment I entered the premises, butterflies entered my stomach along with a slight lump in the throat. They continued to reside in their respective places, as I bade good bye to a never ending list of people, sent out the habitual good bye email to everyone, along with the last day formalities. However, I am glad that somehow I found the strength to handle myself with dignity and grace (read that as not bursting into tears and making everyone else feel embarrassed) through out the day. In fact, I even managed to joke to my lunch companion that "Even the rain god is crying today" when it started to slightly drizzle. The small farewell meet was a surprise and gave me a very nice and warm feeling.

(I do not regret the decision at all, but it was a very hard feeling to say good bye to a hard earned job and a place which has been after all like a home away from home, in-spite of all the cribbing that I do on its shortcomings. It seems like an era has come to an end, to use the words of another dear friend.)

Finally, all formalities over, and the last goodbyes done, it was time to leave the premises. On the way back to the station, it started to drizzle again. The walk back to railway station is something that will be in my mind for a very very long time. It brought back memories, buried deep inside, both good and bad, the highs and the lows, of dear friendships that happened for life and a deep introspection of self - how much I had changed both personally and professionally from the time I joined the company till date. It also brought the waiting tears brimming to the surface at last , but were washed away by the rain unseen by others. I deliberately slowed my walk and gave myself up to the moment totally.

And finally, as I neared the station, it was time for me to say goodbye mentally and to look forward to a better tomorrow, to better happenings in store, to look forward to being with my sweet heart Jillu.

And, as always, thinking of Jillu, brought a bright smile to my face and the familiar need to hurry and be home asap.

6 comments:

A journey called Life said...

this is what i call a straight from the heart account.. i know how it feels when u say, despite all ur complaints, ur place of work was home away from home and how when u walked back to the station, u just gave urself to the moment and let the tears fall..

i travelled the entire narration, Lavanya, that is how descriptive it was..

all the very best, for a new and more exciting innings.. Jillu is sure gonna be a happy girl..

Lavanya Sriram said...

@AJCL : Thank you for your lovely comment and your wishes. Thanks so much.

LIFE_REFACTORED said...

Good Luck Lavanya. The Industry has lost one full time mate and a child has won one! Whom will I cheer for? the child of course! Hip hip hooray!

Lavanya Sriram said...

@L_R : Thank you :) This is similar to one of my colleagues comment that the ultimate winner is Jillu. Thanks

soin said...

adhu rightu thaan..even the place you hate when you leave it orey feelings..final sem for us..so i sort of get that..free

Lavanya Sriram said...

@soin : oh, final sem aa ? so ore hectica irukkume, wih all the last minute projects, exams, campus interviews, farewells, parties etc etc..all the best